Believing in the word of Allah the Quran

Believing in the word of Allah the Quran

Allah Almighty accomplished the religion of truth of peace and His choice by blessing the Ummah with the beloved of all Prophets and last Messengers of Allah, Muhammad (SAW), descending upon Him the true and the greatest book of all time, The Holy Quran to let us guide and knowing Islam and learning quran, as narrated: O’ people! No Prophet would be raised after me and no new Ummah (would be formed) after you.

And,

Verily I have left amongst you that which will never lead you astray; the Book of Allah, which if you hold fast you shall never go astray

Read Quran it is the true word of Allah; Muhammad (SAW) is referring about it. Thus the Quran turns out to be an ultimate way of guidance descended upon all mankind till the Day of Judgment.

And also in Surah e Baqara, Allah Himself glorifies the Holy Quran

Al-Baqara [2:2] this is the book; in it is guidance sure, without doubt, to those who fear Allah.

After this it leaves no room for argument to the guided ones or doubt in hearts and souls of true believers that the book that was reviled on prophet Muhammad (SAW) the holy Quran is the source of guidance for whom who are searching for guidance of Allah and his blessings.

Those of us who believe in greatness of Quran and try to understand and follow the true teachings of God are definitely differentiated from the ones who don’t do so, as narrated in this verse:

Al-Baqara [2:78] and there are among them illiterates, who know not the book, but (see therein their own) desires, and they do nothing but conjecture.

What makes Muslims believe that the Quran

Muslims believe that Prophet Muhammad is not the author of the Quran. God is its Author. The following points bear the fact:

First of all, the Quran itself, at a number of places and in different ways, says that it is from God. One of the claims runs thus: “This is indeed a Quran most honourable, a Book well-guarded…a Revelation from the Lord of the Worlds.” (Quran 56:77-80)

(Here, one ought to know the features of the Quran to understand the claim better. For instance, if the Quran had consisted of a number of books, and each book was made up of a number of chapters, then each of the books had to claim that it was from God in order to render the WHOLE volume as coming from God. But, this is fortunately not so with the Quran. The Quran is just ONE Book made up of 114 chapters. So, if the Quran claims, in any of its chapters, that the Book is from God, then the WHOLE Quran is from God. Yet, the Quran does not make the divine claim only once, but several times in different phrases and in different chapters.)

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He had intercourse with his wife when she was observing a voluntary fast

 

What is the ruling on one who has intercourse with his wife when she is fasting the six days of Shawwaal and he is not fasting?.

Praise be to Allaah.

The one who is observing a
voluntary fast has the choice: he may complete the fast or he may break it,
but completing it is better. 

Ahmad (26535) narrated from
Umm Haani’ (may Allaah be pleased with her) that the Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) entered upon her. He called
for a drink and drank some, then he passed it to her and she drank some. She
said: O Messenger of Allaah, I was fasting. The Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The one who is observing
a voluntary fast has the choice; if he wishes he may fast and if he wishes
he may break the fast.” Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh
al-Jaami’ (3854). 

See also the answer to
question no. 49610. 

If a person fasts one of
the six days of Shawwaal, and he wants to break the fast, he may do so,
whether he does it by eating, having intercourse, or anything else. 

If this woman fasted
without her husband’s permission, then he may call her to his bed, and she
has to respond. 

But if she was fasting with
his permission, then he does not have the right to spoil her fast, but if he
wants that then it is better for her to respond to him. 

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may
Allaah have mercy on him) said: If she observes a naafil fast with his
permission, then it is not permissible for him to spoil her fast, because he
gave her permission. But in that case if she is observing a naafil fast with
his permission and he wants her to come to his bed, is it better for her to
continue fasting and refuse her husband’s request? The other option is
better, which is responding to her husband’s request, because responding to
her husband’s request is basically obligatory, and the voluntary fast is
mustahabb, and because if she refuses even though his desire is strong, then
he may feel some resentment towards her and the relationship between them
may be affected as a result of that. 

Majmoo’ Fataawa Ibn
‘Uthaymeen (21/174). 

And Allaah knows best.

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The mother’s rights over her daughter are great but the husband’s rights over his wife are greater

 

I have two situations that are related with which I ask two questions. I hope I can be helped. The situation is as follows and I do not know how to fix it. My mother is very demanding and fights with me all the time about my husband who has been very good to me and my children and her. She wants him to take her traveling and other things that involve spending a lot of time with her and he does not wish to do due to his demanding job as a doctor and because he feels that they will not get along. She visits our home at least 4-5 months every year and makes me take her out on a daily basis not even worrying that it makes me neglect my home and children. She is also very busy trying to make her own businesses so she fought with me about taking my brother or sister to live with me (they are 16 and 18) and tells me it is my right and I don’t need to even have my husband’s permission on the matter. She also refuses to pay a loan that her and my father (who passed away 2 years ago) made me take when I was in college attending a university I didn’t even want to attend when I was 16 years old, this loan has destroyed my name making it impossible for me to buy anything with my name. She has done this to many people she owes money. On top of this, before my father passed away, he had written all properties and money in her name to make it easier to disperse to each of us (we are four girls and one boy) rather than involving an outside party; after he died, she said it is all in her name, and that she paid for a lot of his businesses before they succeded so she will keep all the money as her own until she dies. I even gave her about $100,000 (all the money I have ever saved and worked for) because she pretended that she was going to use it to pay off my dad’s debts and she used it for a summer house instead and denies I ever gave her a penny since I never told anyone else because I wanted it between me, my mom and Allah swt even though I know she has a lot of money of her own. My husband was tired of this (and many more bad situations) and so he confronted her about the least of these problems – the old school loan, that was taken over 6 years before we were even married and keeps on multiplying in debt and on my name. He then continued to confront her about the many wrong things that have happened and involved his family too. She got very angry and didn’t want to speak to either of us. Naturally, I wanted to fulfill my obligations to my mother so I managed to get on good speaking terms with her so I do not defy silaat al rahim. We speak fine most of the time but after a couple weeks of that she will go back to insulting my husband, telling me to defy him and disobey him in order for him to apologize to her, and insulting me and my husband with very hurtful and shameful words. This relationship is badly affecting my marriage and my time at home and with my children. I cannot think about anything else and my husband doesn’t want to apologize because he is right and feels my mom has not changed her bad ways and will not even pay off the old loan. And at the same time it is extremely difficult to communicate with her on a healthy level. We live in two different countries (me in America and her in Egypt) and she says if I love her and don’t want to upset Allah swt that I will bring my three kids and visit her, my husband does not want me to leave him and she knows this and insists that I am being a bad muslim and that Allah swt will punish me for disobeying my mother. I have tried to advise her to fear Allah swt and she gets mad and says I should obey her and be against my husband. My husband tells me to try to keep good ties with her as much as I can, and is a very good husband and father otherwise, Alhamdolilah we have a very happy marriage and three healthy children. And so my questions are: 1. What are my obligations to my mother in such an ugly situation, keeping in mind that she continues to insult my husband in our phone calls (we live in two different countries) and asks me to disobey and defy him and cause problems in order for him to apologize to her. This communication has left me emotionally drained, it is what I think about most of my days and it wastes so much of time that I can use with studying or caring for my home. What is the minimum in regards to visiting and speaking to her so that Allah swt will not be angry with me and at the same time I will fulfill my obligation to her and not have to worry about her saying that Allah swt is upset. 2. Who is responsible for this loan. Keeping in mind that I was forced to attend this university, told to take a loan by mother and father, was only 16-18 years old and my husband was not told about this loan before marriage. Also, my mother has more than enough money to pay it off. Your help is deeply appreciated and greatly needed as soon as possible.

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly: 

The mother’s status in sharee’ah cannot be denied. Allaah has
enjoined that her children should honour her, and He has forbidden them to
disobey her; He has ruled that the mother is the most entitled of people to
one’s good company, as it says in the well-known hadeeth, when a man said: O
Messenger of Allaah, which of the people is most deserving of my good
companionship? He said: “Your mother, then your mother, then your mother,
then your father, then the next closest and the next closest.” Narrated by
Muslim (2548). 

This is the mother’s right, and that is her status. It is not
permissible for her to consume her children’s wealth unlawfully, rather she
must give each one his or her rights, and divide the estate in accordance
with the laws of Allaah. It is also not permissible for the mother to incite
her daughter against her husband and spoil the good relationship between
them. These actions of this mother are evil deeds which are not acceptable
in Islam, and they bring the threat of sin and punishment. 

Perhaps the greatest way in which you can honour your mother
is by deterring her from consuming haraam wealth and doing haraam things,
and stopping her from wronging people unlawfully, and remind her of the sin
involved in spoiling the relationship between husband and wife, and the sin
of gheebah (backbiting), reviling and insulting others, and other haraam
things that she is doing, such as tabarruj (wanton display) and travelling
without a mahram, if these are true in her case. 

With regard to your siblings who want your mother to live
with you and your husband, you are not obliged to do that according to
sharee’ah, rather it is the duty of your mother, and in this case the right
belongs to your husband: if he agrees to that, all well and good, otherwise
you are not obliged to do this, rather we do not advise your husband to
accept this situation, because they are not neglected or in need of such a
thing, they are not poor and in need of someone to spend on them, and your
mother is not unable to take care of their affairs. Taking this
responsibility from her is helping her to do the things that she is doing
that go against Islam, and to neglect her duties, and pass on this burden to
your husband, and put pressure on you and your household with something that
is not required of you in the first place, let alone the unacceptable things
that may result from your sister living in the same house as a man who is
not her mahram (your husband). We do not advise you to accept this situation
under any circumstances. 

Secondly: 

The status and rights of the mother do not supersede the
rights of the husband, rather the husband’s rights are greater and take
precedence over your mother’s rights. Your obedience to him takes precedence
over your obedience to her, and the wise wife strives to please her husband
by doing what he wants so long as it is not contrary to sharee’ah, and she
strives to honour her mother in ways that do not go against her husband’s
commands. If there is a conflict of interest, then she should put her
husband’s commands and wishes first. 

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him)
was asked about a woman who got married, and was no longer under her
parents’ care. Which is better – honouring her parents or obeying her
husband? 

He replied: When a woman gets married, her husband has more
authority over her than her parents, and obeying her husband is more
obligatory for her. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allaah and to their
husbands), and guard in the husband’s absence what Allaah orders them to
guard (e.g. their chastity and their husband’s property)” [al-Nisa’ 4:34].
And in a hadeeth the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said: “This world is temporary conveniences and the best of its
comforts is a believing wife, who when you look at her she pleases you and
if you tell her to do something she obeys you, and if you are away from her
she protects you with regard to  herself and your wealth.”. In Saheeh Abi
Haatim it is narrated that Abu Hurayrah said: The Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a woman offers
her five (daily prayers) and fasts her month and guards her chastity and
obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from whichever of its gates she
wants.” In al-Tirmidhi it is narrated that Umm Salamah (may Allaah be
pleased with her) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: Any woman who dies when her husband is pleased
with her, will enter Paradise.” This was narrated by al-Tirmidhi, who said
it is a hasan hadeeth. It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If I were to order
anyone to prostrate to anyone, I would have ordered women to prostrate to
their husbands.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi who said it is a hasan hadeeth. It
was also narrated by Abu Dawood with the wording: “I would have ordered
women to prostrate to their husbands because of the rights that Allaah has
given them over them.” In al-Musnad it is narrated from Anas that the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “It is not
acceptable for any human to prostrate to another, but if it were acceptable
for any human to prostrate to another, I would have ordered women to
prostrate to their husbands, because of the greatness of the rights they
have over them. By the One in Whose hand is my soul, if there were sores
from his feet to the top of his head flowing with pus, then she licked them,
she would not have given him all his rights.” 

And he quoted ahaadeeth about the virtue of obeying the
husband. 

There are many ahaadeeth on this topic from the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). Zayd ibn Thaabit said: The
husband is a sayyid (lord or master) in the Book of Allaah. Then he quoted
the verse (interpretation of the meaning): “They both found her lord
(i.e. her husband) at the door” [Yoosuf 12:25]. ‘Umar ibn al-Khattaab
said: Marriage is slavery, so let one of you look to whom he is giving his
beloved daughter to be a slave to. In al-Tirmidhi and elsewhere it is
narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: “I urge you to treat women well, for they are like prisoners with
you.”  

So the woman is like a slave of her husband, or like a
prisoner; she should not go out of his house without his permission, whether
she is told to do so by her father, her mother or anyone else, according to
scholarly consensus. 

If a man wants to take her to another place, so long as he is
doing what is required of him, and observing the sacred limits of Allaah
with regard to her, and her father tells her not to obey him in that, then
she must obey her husband and not her father, because in that case the
parents are wrongdoers, and they have no right to tell her not to obey
someone like this husband, and she does not have the right to obey her
mother if she tells her to leave him or to cause trouble to him so that he
will divorce her, such as demanding more maintenance and more clothing, and
demanding (the deferred portion of) her mahr so that he may divorce her.  It
is not permissible for her to obey either of her parents by divorcing him if
he fears Allaah with regard to her.  

In the four Sunans and Saheeh Ibn Abi Haatim it
is narrated that Thawbaan said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Any woman who asks her husband for a
divorce when there is nothing wrong, the fragrance of Paradise will be
forbidden to her.” According to another hadeeth: “The women who ask for
khula’ and the women who make a wanton display of themselves are indeed
hypocrites.” 

But if both or one of her parents tells her to do something
that involves obedience to Allaah, such as praying regularly, speaking the
truth and fulfilling trusts, and tells her not to squander or waste her
money, and other things that have been enjoined or forbidden by Allaah and
His Messenger, then she must obey them in that, even if the command comes
from someone other than her parents, so how about if it comes from her
parents? 

If her husband tells her not to do something that is enjoined
by Allaah, and he tells her to do something that Allaah has forbidden, then
she should not obey him in that. The Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no obedience to any created being if it
involves disobedience towards the Creator.” If a master orders his slave to
do something that involves disobedience towards Allaah, it is not
permissible for him to obey him by disobeying Him, so how can a woman obey
her husband or one of her parents by committing sin? All goodness is in
obeying Allaah and His Messenger, and all evil is in disobeying Allaah and
His Messenger. End quote. Majmoo’ al-Fataawa (32/261-264). 

This is a strong answer based on knowledge, and it is
sufficient to explain what is meant, which is that it is not permissible for
your mother to spoil the relationship between you and your husband, and it
is not permissible for you to obey her in that, and your husband’s right to
your obedience is greater than your mother’s. 

Thirdly: 

Just as you are not obliged to take care of any of your
siblings because of your commitment of your husband and the requirement that
he should first agree to that, the same applies to your visiting your mother
with your children. This is not permissible except with the consent of your
husband, and you have done well to refuse your mother’s request. We affirm
that this refusal is Islamically acceptable, especially since you have no
mahram to travel with you. 

With regard to limiting the number of your mother’s visits to
you, this is something that is also up to your husband, and you can work it
out with him. The husband has the right to prevent anyone who he thinks is a
trouble-maker from entering his house, even if they are your family. As you
are in agreement and you have a good relationship, then the matter is
simple. All you have to do is agree on a specific number and time for her
visits, and stipulate that to her. Your husband has every right to do this;
indeed we think that if he stops her altogether he will be doing the right
thing, but there is the hope that if her visits are restricted to only a
few, and do not affect your family’s happiness, then there is no reason why
they should be prevented, and there is nothing wrong with tolerating them.
Determining the limit is up to you and you should consult one another and
come to some agreement. 

Shaykh Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have
mercy on him) said: “And not allow into your houses anyone whom you dislike”
means, they (wives) should not allow anyone to enter the house if you (the
husband) do not want him or her to enter, even if it is her mother or her
father. It is not permissible for her to let her mother, father, sister,
brother, paternal uncle, maternal uncle, paternal aunt or maternal aunt into
her husband’s house, if he objects to that. Attention is drawn to this
because some women – Allaah forbid – are bad even to their daughters. If
they see that the daughters are settled and happy with their husbands, they
become jealous – Allaah forbid – even though they are mothers, and they try
to spoil things between the daughter and her husband. So the husband has the
right to stop such a mother from entering his house, and he has the right to
say to his wife: She should not enter my house. He has the right to prevent
her according to sharee’ah, and he has the right to prevent his wife from
going to see her, because she is namaamah (one who spreads malicious gossip)
and a troublemaker. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him) said: “No spreader of malicious gossip will enter Paradise.” End quote.
Sharh Riyaadh al-Saaliheen (2/91, hadeeth no. 276), 

Fourthly: 

It seems that the sin of the riba-based loan that is
mentioned in your question is borne by you, because you were an adult and
responsible for your dealings. So try to get back what is rightfully yours
from your mother, and stop the mounting interest payments that result from
your delay in repaying it. Try not to pay back anything but the original
amount without the interest (riba). If you are not able to do that, then
there is no blame on you, but it is essential to repent sincerely, because
riba is a major sin. 

We ask Allaah to guide your mother and to reconcile between
you and your husband. 

See also the answer to question no.
96665 which discusses the reasons
why mothers interfere in the lives of their married daughters, and ways of
dealing with that. 

And Allaah knows best.

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He did the marriage contract with her and was intimate with her without intercourse in Ramadaan, and he had intercourse with her before announcing the marriage!

 

I got engaged to a religious brother two months ago. He wanted us to have the contract done straight away instead of just engagement. But my family refused saying that there is no reason to hurry. We used to be together alone without a guardian, therefore, what I was afraid of has happened (foreplay without intercourse) in the best month Ramadan. Since then I have been in great grief. How can I fast five months as expiation for what happened during five days of Ramadan (a month fasting expiation for every day)? This is my first problem that keeps me sleepless. Please guide me. 

Two weeks ago we had our marriage contract done. We had intercourse before announcing the consummation of our marriage that would take place next year. I read many answers on your website regarding the rights of the husband after marriage contract and before consummation, and found that he should wait until marriage is announced to avoid any problems. I told him that I will not agree to intercourse until we announce the marriage; he refused and insisted on having his right which is to enjoy me as his wife. What should I do? My family do not know that I am not anymore virgin. And I fear I get pregnant before our announced marriage. What shall I do in this situation? Shall I obey him when he needs me? Should I tell my family that we had intercourse, although they will never accept this?.

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly: 

If the basic
conditions of marriage, such as the proposal and acceptance, and consent of
the woman’s wali (guardian), are met in the presence of two witnesses, or by
announcing this marriage contract, then the woman becomes the wife of the
man, and it is permissible for each of them to enjoy intimacy with the
other. 

It is
permissible for the couple to enjoy intimacy before announcing the marriage
by kissing and so on, even if that leads to emission of maniy, so long as no
intercourse takes place. 

Secondly: 

No expiation
(kafaarah) is required of one who breaks the fast in Ramadaan with no
excuse, unless the fast is broken by intercourse. Expiation is not required
of the one who breaks the fast with anything other than intercourse. 

Based on this,
no expiation is required for the intimacy that took place in Ramadaan – so
long as you say that it took place without intercourse. If emission of maniy
occurred as a result, then the fast of that day was spoiled, and you must
repent to Allaah from that, regret what has happened, and fast one day to
replace that day. 

But if no
maniy was emitted, then the fast is valid, and you do not have to do
anything. 

See also the
answers to questions no. 71213,
14315,
49614 and
37887. 

Thirdly: 

With regard to
what happened, of your husband having intercourse with you before
announcement of the marriage, he has obviously done wrong and there are many
consequences to his action. How could he be religiously committed and not
heed the warnings and advice of the scholars to those who do marriage
contracts not to hasten to consummate the marriage. What he claims, that
this is his right, is not correct. There was an agreement between him and
your family to delay the consummation until the time that had been agreed
upon, so he should have fulfilled that agreement, and adhered to this
condition which he had agreed to. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The condition which most deserves to
be fulfilled is that by means of which intimacy becomes permissible for
you.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (2721) and Muslim (1418). 

Shaykh ‘Abd
al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked: 

What is it
permissible for a man to do with his wife after the marriage contract had
been done and before consummation of the marriage? 

He replied: 

It is
permissible for him to do what men do with their wives, but he should be
patient until the time agreed for consummation of the marriage. If he needs
to visit her or get in touch with her, with her family’s permission, for a
clear reason, there is nothing wrong with that. If he meets her and is alone
with her with her family’s permission, there is nothing wrong with that. But
if it is done secretly without anyone knowing, that is dangerous, because
she may get pregnant from him, then he may think badly of her or deny that
he was intimate with her, so there may be a lot of fitnah and trouble. 

What he should
do is refrain and be patient until the time agreed for consummation of the
marriage. If there is a need to contact her or meet with her, that should be
with her father or her mother or brother, so that nothing can happen that
may have negative consequences. End quote. 

Fataawa
al-Shaykh Ibn Baaz
(21/208, 209). 

Shaykh
Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: 

If a man does
the marriage contract with a woman, then he is her husband and he may speak
to her on the phone and send letters to her. There is nothing wrong with him
being in touch with her, but without intercourse, because she is his wife.
If he calls her and enjoys sitting with her and kissing her, there is
nothing wrong with that, but intercourse should not take place, because
there is danger involved in intercourse and it may lead to him thinking
badly of her, or she may get pregnant from this intercourse and give birth
before the set time for consummation, so the woman may be accused of
misconduct. End quote. 

Liqaa’aat
al-baab il-Maftooh
(175/question no. 12). 

Fourthly: 

With regard to
what you have to do, it is as follows: 

1.     

Immediately give up any contact between you that may lead to intercourse.

2.     

Urge
your husband to fear Allaah and hasten to announce the marriage, even if it
involves incurring debts, or some hard work. The matter does not have to do
with the possibility of pregnancy, but with the fact that the hymen has
certainly been broken. This may have serious consequences if – Allaah forbid
– he dies or divorces you.

3.     

If
the husband cannot bring forward the wedding, then it is essential to tell
your parents about what happened and not conceal it from them. This is very
much in your interests. If he acknowledges what he did, then that is much
less serious than if he were to divorce you then deny it, or if he were to
die. 

And Allaah knows best.

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A wife should not let anyone enter her husband’s home except with his permission

 

When should a husband or wife allow or not allow others ‘mahrams or non-mahrams’ to enter the couple’s home?.

Praise be to Allaah.

The marital home is a noble and honourable home, which Allaah
has commanded both spouses to protect; the wife in particular is commanded
to protect the trust of this home, because she is the lady of the house. 

It was narrated from Jaabir that the Messenger of Allaah
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said in the Farewell Khutbah: 

“Fear Allaah with regard to women, for you have taken them as
a trust from Allaah, and intimacy with them has become permissible to you by
the word of Allaah. Your rights over them are that they should not allow
anyone whom you dislike to sit on your furniture. If they do that, then hit
them, but in a manner that does not cause injury or leave a mark.  Their
rights over you are that you should provide for them and clothe them in a
reasonable manner.” Narrated by Muslim (1218). 

The issue of permission to enter the marital home may be
summed up in the following points: 

Firstly: 

If the husband gives his wife clear permission to admit a
specific person who is one of her mahrams or a woman, or if his permission
is general, then it is permissible for the wife in that case to admit them
to his house, according to scholarly consensus. 

Secondly: 

If the husband has remained silent and not given permission,
then she should do what she thinks is most likely to be appropriate, and
allow to enter his house those whom she thinks her husband would most likely
not mind if they entered his house, of those for whom it is permissible to
enter upon the wife in her husband’s absence of mahrams and women. But if
she thinks it most likely that her husband would not want a specific person
to enter the house in his absence, then it is not permissible for her to
admit him. This is according to scholarly consensus. 

It says in al-Mawsoo’ah al-Fiqhiyyah (30/125): 

One of the husband’s rights over his wife is that she should
not allow anyone to enter his house except with his permission, because of
the report narrated by Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him), that
the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
said: “No woman should fast when her husband is present without his
permission, and she should not allow anyone to enter his house when he is
present without his permission.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (4899) and Muslim
(1026). 

Ibn Hajar quoted al-Nawawi as saying: This hadeeth indicates
that the wife should not overlook the right of the husband not to let anyone
enter his house except with his permission. This is to be understood as
referring to situations where she does not know whether her husband would
approve. But if she knows that her husband would approve of it, then there
is no sin on her, such as one whose custom is to admit guests to a place
that is prepared for them, whether he is present or not, so admitting them
does not need special permission from him. 

To sum up, his permission is important and must be taken into
account, whether it is specific or general terms. End quote. 

Thirdly: 

If the husband has clearly stated that he does not want a
specific person to be admitted, or anyone to enter his house in his absence,
then it is haraam for her to allow anyone to enter her husband’s house. 

But does the husband have the right to tell his wife not to
allow her parents or mahrams to enter and visit her? 

There is a difference of opinion among the scholars
concerning this issue and there are two views: that it is permitted and that
it is not permitted. 

It says in al-Mawsoo’ah al-Fiqhiyyah (24:82): 

The correct view according to the Hanafi madhhab, which is
also the Maaliki view, is that the husband should not prevent the wife’s
parents from entering upon her once a week, and he should not prevent other
mahrams from doing so once a year. The same applies to her children from
another husband if they are small; the husband should not prevent them from
entering upon her once every day. But if he thinks that her parents will
corrupt her, then they should be allowed to enter with a woman appointed by
the husband whom he trusts, and her wages are to be paid by him. 

The Shaafa’i view, which is also one view among the Hanafis,
is that he may disallow them to enter, the reason being that the house is
his property and he has the right to forbid anyone to enter his property. 

The Hanbalis are of the view that the husband does not have
the right to forbid her parents to visit her, because that is severing ties
of kinship. But if he knows from circumstantial evidence that some harm will
be caused by their visit, or by the visit of one of them, then he may forbid
it. End quote. 

The most correct of these opinions is that the husband has no
right to prevent his wife’s parents and mahrams from visiting her, because
that is severing ties of kinship, and severing ties of kinship is haraam in
all cases. So it is not permissible for the husband to try to cause
something haraam to happen, rather he should strive to reconcile and uphold
ties of kinship. It is well known that honouring the wife’s mahrams is
honouring the wife and keeping good company with her. The Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The best of you is the
one who is best to his family.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (3895); he said:
this is a saheeh ghareeb hasan hadeeth. It was also classed as saheeh by
al-Albaani in al-Saheehah (1174). 

If he is suspicious about one of his wife’s mahrams or he
thinks it most likely that one of them or one of the parents will try to
cause trouble between him and his wife, then in that case it is permissible
for him to prevent them from visiting, so as to ward off trouble, and there
is no sin on him in that case. 

See question no. 10680. 

And Allaah knows best.

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Is spending on a defiantly disobedient wife obligatory if she is pregnant?

 

My wife went out of my house without my permission and went to her family’s house. She has been there for a few months and is pregnant. Am I obliged to spend on her during her pregnancy?.

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly: 

It is not permissible for a woman to go out of her husband’s
house without his permission. If she does that then she is naashiz
(defiantly disobedient) and she has no right to maintenance until she comes
back to obeying her husband. 

But it is essential to know the reason why she has gone for
this long time. She may have done that to flee from a husband who was
mistreating her or beating her or abusing her and so on. In that case the
shortcoming and transgression were on his part, not hers. 

Secondly: 

If a woman defiantly disobeys her husband when she is
pregnant, is the husband obliged to maintain her during the pregnancy or
not? There is a difference of opinion among the fuqaha’ concerning this
matter, which is based on their difference of opinion as to whether the
maintenance during the pregnancy is for the infant or the mother. The
majority of scholars are of the view that a pregnant wife who is defiantly
disobedient is entitled to maintenance. This is the view of the Maalikis and
Hanbalis, and is one view of the Shaafa’is. 

Ibn Qudaamah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: Is
maintenance due to the pregnant woman for the sake of the infant or is it
due to the infant? There are two views, one of which is that it is due to
the infant. This was the view favoured by Abu Bakr, because it is due owing
to the existence of the infant, and ceases to be due when he is weaned. This
indicates that it is for him (the infant). The second view is that it is due
to her (the mother) because of him (the infant), because it is obligatory
whether the man is well off or hard up, so it is like maintenance of wives;
and because it is not waived with the passage of time, so it is like the
maintenance of the woman so long as the infant is still alive. 

Al-Shaafa’i had two views, like those mentioned above, and
many other issues are based on these differences, such as: … If a man’s wife
is defiantly disobedient, and she is pregnant, and we say that maintenance
is due to the infant, then her maintenance is not waived, because the
maintenance of the infant is not waived because of his mother’s defiant
disobedience. But if we say that maintenance is due to her, then there is no
maintenance for her (in this case), because of her defiant disobedience. End
quote from al-Mughni (8/187), 

It says in Mataalib Ooli al-Nuha (5/627): Maintenance
spent on the mother is due to the infant himself; it is not due to her
because of him, because it is due because of his existence, and it is waived
if he is no longer there. So it is obligatory to spend on a pregnant wife
who is defiantly disobedient, because the maintenance is for the infant, and
it cannot be waived because of the mother’s defiant disobedience. End
quote. 

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
There is a difference of opinion concerning this issue among the fuqaha’.
Some of them say that maintenance is due to the mother because of the
infant. 

Some say that maintenance is due to the child and not to the
mother because of him. This second view is more correct, but because we have
no way of making the maintenance reach the infant except by nourishing the
mother, then maintenance must be given to the mother because of the infant. 

Based on this difference, if the wife is defiantly
disobedient when she is pregnant, is she entitled to maintenance? 

If we say that maintenance is due to the infant [which is the
more correct view, as stated above], then maintenance is due to her, because
the infant is not being defiantly disobedient. But if we say that
maintenance is due to her, then her maintenance is waived, because she is
defiantly disobedient. End quote from al-Sharh al-Mumti’ (13/470). 

Based on that, then spending on the infant is obligatory for
the father, even if his mother is defiantly disobedient. 

If they dispute about the amount of maintenance, then the
case should be referred to the qaadi (judge), so that he may resolve the
dispute justly, as he sees fit. 

May Allaah help us all to do that which He loves and which
pleases Him. 

And Allaah knows best.

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Divorcing a wife because of her bad attitude

 

My brother-in-law had a miserable married life for last two years. his wife used to behave badly with him and the worst thing the girl used to torture /abuse her mother-in-law .

After many tormenting and disgusting discussions the boy,his mother, his father and his sister decided divorce is the only solution and he divorced. Please clarify whether the stance taken was right or not? .

Praise be to Allaah.
 

 

The basic principle concerning divorce is
that it is makrooh. This is indicated by the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Those who take an oath not to have sexual relation with their wives must wait for four months,
then if they return (change their idea in this period), verily, Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

227. And if they decide upon divorce, then
Allaah is All-Hearer, All-Knower”

[al-Baqarah 2:226] 

With regard to the oath not to have sexual
relations, Allaah says “Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful”, but with regard to divorce, He says, “All-Hearer, All-Knower”. This contains
an element of warning, and this indicates that divorce is makrooh or disliked by Allaah. 

But there may be some situations in which there is no alternative to divorce, and matters
may reach a point where divorce becomes essential. In a situation such as that mentioned in the question, divorce is an appropriate solution,
because one of the rights that a husband has over his wife is that she should respect his family, especially the husband’s mother. The mother’s
rights over a man come before his wife’s rights, so the wife should help her husband to honour his mother. 

The scholars (may Allaah have mercy on them) have stated that divorce is permissible in
cases where it is needed because of the wife’s bad attitude and bad conduct and because she is causing too much harm and not doing what she is
supposed to do.  

Al-Mughni,
10/324 

And Allaah knows best.

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Divorcing a wife because of her bad attitude

 

My brother-in-law had a miserable married life for last two years. his wife used to behave badly with him and the worst thing the girl used to torture /abuse her mother-in-law .

After many tormenting and disgusting discussions the boy,his mother, his father and his sister decided divorce is the only solution and he divorced. Please clarify whether the stance taken was right or not? .

Praise be to Allaah.
 

 

The basic principle concerning divorce is
that it is makrooh. This is indicated by the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Those who take an oath not to have sexual relation with their wives must wait for four months,
then if they return (change their idea in this period), verily, Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

227. And if they decide upon divorce, then
Allaah is All-Hearer, All-Knower”

[al-Baqarah 2:226] 

With regard to the oath not to have sexual
relations, Allaah says “Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful”, but with regard to divorce, He says, “All-Hearer, All-Knower”. This contains
an element of warning, and this indicates that divorce is makrooh or disliked by Allaah. 

But there may be some situations in which there is no alternative to divorce, and matters
may reach a point where divorce becomes essential. In a situation such as that mentioned in the question, divorce is an appropriate solution,
because one of the rights that a husband has over his wife is that she should respect his family, especially the husband’s mother. The mother’s
rights over a man come before his wife’s rights, so the wife should help her husband to honour his mother. 

The scholars (may Allaah have mercy on them) have stated that divorce is permissible in
cases where it is needed because of the wife’s bad attitude and bad conduct and because she is causing too much harm and not doing what she is
supposed to do.  

Al-Mughni,
10/324 

And Allaah knows best.

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Does signing a divorce paper count as divorce?

 

If a husband receives an official form from the court on which is written the words “I divorce my wife” and he signs it, is that counted as a divorce?

Praise be to Allaah.
 

 

Yes, this is a divorce if the name of the
wife is written on the form

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He pronounced divorce three times but the qaadi wrote it down as one divorce. The ‘iddah has now ended and he wants to take her back

 

I divorced my wife about eight years ago. When I asked the qaadi to record the divorce I said: “I divorce my wife So and so the daughter of So and so three times.” When I did that I knew what he had written down because I am an educated man, but when the scribe wrote it down in the records, he wrote it as one divorce. This gave my wife the hope that I would take her back and she has not remarried until now… Now I want to take her back, and her family also wants that.

 Should I go against my intention and proceed on the basis of what is written in the records or not?.

Praise be to Allaah.
 

 

The scholars differed concerning the ruling on one who
divorces his wife by saying “I divorce you thrice”. The majority of scholars
are of the view that this means that divorce has taken place three times;
others are of the view that divorce takes place only once. 

Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him)
was asked: 

A man divorced his wife by saying “I divorce you thrice”;
what is the ruling on that?

 He replied: 

If a man divorces his wife three times with one word, such as
saying, “You are thrice divorced”, the majority of scholars are of the view
that the woman is indeed thrice divorced and becomes forbidden for her
husband until she has been married to another man in a serious marriage in
which the new husband has intercourse with her and they only separate as a
result of death or divorce, not a tahleel marriage (i.e., a marriage of
convenience aimed at making it permissible for her to remarry her former
husband). 

They quoted as evidence for that the fact that ‘Umar ibn
al-Khattaab (may Allaah be pleased with him) counted such a divorce as being
three and judged among people accordingly. 

Other scholars were of the view that this is to be regarded
as a single divorce, and the husband may take her back so long as the ‘iddah
has not yet ended. If the ‘iddah has ended then she may marry him with a new
marriage contract. They quoted as evidence for that the report narrated in
Saheeh Muslim from Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) who
said:  “At the time of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him), the time of Abu Bakr (may Allaah be pleased with him)
and the first two years of the caliphate of ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased
with him), a threefold divorce was counted as one. ‘Umar said: “People are
being hasty with regard to a matter in which they should not rush. Let us
count it as three and judge between people accordingly .” According to
another report narrated by Muslim: Abu’l-Sahba’ said to Ibn ‘Abbaas (may
Allaah be pleased with them): “Was not three counted as one at the time of
the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and
the time of Abu Bakr (may Allaah be pleased with him) and the first three
years of the time of  ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him)?” He said:
“Yes,” 

They also quote as evidence the report narrated by Imam Ahmad
in al-Musnad with a jayyid isnaad from Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be
pleased with him), that Abu Rakaanah divorced his wife by saying “I divorce
you thrice”, then he regretted it, so the Prophet (peace and blessings
of Allaah be upon him) returned her to him with one word and said, “This is
only one (divorce).” This hadeeth and the one before it are to be understood
as referring to divorcing by saying “I divorce you thrice”, in order to
reconcile these two hadeeths and the verse in which Allaah says
(interpretation of the meaning): 

“The divorce is twice”

[al-Baqarah 2:229] 

“And if he has divorced her (the third time), then she is
not lawful unto him thereafter until she has married another husband. Then,
if the other husband divorces her, it is no sin on both of them that they
reunite, provided they feel that they can keep the limits ordained by
Allaah. These are the limits of Allaah, which He makes plain for the people
who have knowledge”

[al-Baqarah 2:230] 

This was the view of Ibn
‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) according to a saheeh report
narrated from him; according to the other report narrated from him he shared
the view of the majority. The view that they should be regarded as one
divorce was narrated from ‘Ali, ‘Abd al-Rahmaan ibn ‘Awf and al-Zubayr ibn
al-‘Awwaam (may Allaah be pleased with them). 

This was also the view of a number of the Taabi’een, Muhammad
ibn Ishaaq the author of al-Seerah, and a number of the earlier and
later scholars. It was also the view favoured by Shaykh al-Islam Ibn
Taymiyah and his student Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on them). This
is also my view, because that is following all of the texts, and because it
is also more merciful and kind to the Muslims. 

Fataawa Islamiyyah, 3/281, 282. 

It seems that the qaadi
was also of this view, which is that the threefold divorce counts as one
divorce. Based on this there is nothing wrong with taking her back. 

But after the ‘iddah is over you cannot take her back, rather
you have to make a new marriage contract with her. 

With regard to taking her
back after the ‘iddah is over – i.e., after three menstrual cycles – this is
not valid, because once a woman’s ‘iddah is completed she becomes a
“stranger” for her husband and she is not permissible for him except with a
new marriage contract.

 Fataawa Islamiyyah,
3/293 

And Allaah knows best.

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